September 26 2016
I woke up and felt like I needed to jam. I rolled out of bed, selected Spotify, and not only did it work because WE HAVE WiFi, but “Africa” came on.
Yesterday evening I think the frustration began to build. Another day of seeking some connection to the outside world, and stressing out about contacting my other school… I know, I know. Last week I had wayyy bigger problems. But when you’re still settling into a new place, you want to be able to contact your people back home without the struggle.
Well so, there we sat, watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians because what else were we going to do, and I casually go to turn my data back on. (I’ve been keeping it in airplane mode when not in use so as not to use all my data.) And my phone blows up- notifications all over the place. Because we had WiFi. Just like that. So those prayers to the internet gods actually worked.
I then proceeded to disperse like lightning to my room to Skype my twin sister.
As I’ve worked towards adjusting to all the new, even basic things like picking up groceries, a lot of my memories have been surfacing.
It’s a strange cross between the future and the past, and the smallest things can make me feel a memory so thoroughly. I was doing squats and was overwhelmed by the memory of doing them in my apartment gym with my roommate/best friend. Squats made me feel homesick!?? Or a song coming on and of all songs it’s “Africa,” which reminds me of one specific person and dancing around my college kitchen.
In an overwhelming world of all new, it’s the smallest things that connect me to people and places back home. Things I never would have considered important memories. And even though feeling homesick is painful, it is also a blessing.
How lucky am I that I have such amazing memories, however big or small, that make being here sometimes really hard? How blessed that I have so many friends and family back home to miss?
There is something so extreme about everything here. The constant highs and lows that just a month ago I didn’t experience or anticipate. It’s the feeling of having to push yourself when all you want to do is stay in bed. It’s the satisfaction of experiencing something amazing and new because you got out of bed.
One of my favorite quotes from when I was abroad in England was:
And my favorite poem when it comes to experiences like this will always be by Dr. Seuss.